Another parent has killed their child, in this case, children this week. How many is that this year?? I have lost count already. How many more?? Regardless if you are of the recovery mindset or ND right here right now none of that matters. No parent should feel so overwhelmed to find that the only avenue left is to kill their own flesh and blood.
We all know autism is overwhelming for us the loneliness, the endless hours of therapy, treatments, financial worries, stigma from so-called family and so-called friends it's never-ending. I don't know anyone who can survive on 2 to 5 hours of sleep and not want to go crazy and this can be after one night. Imagine doing it weeks to months on end, many of us do it because our kids don't sleep.
At the end of the day we have to keep this mantra in mind," Never give up...never ever give up." Autism is treatable and recovery is happening. Autism is the journey you CANNOT take alone!!!! If you do it will eat you up and spit you out and there will be nothing left of you for your children or your spouse. When someone offers help TAKE IT!!! From friends, from family, find a support group. In this day when the internet can help so much even a Yahoo group is an amazing resource for help and support. You're allowed to cry and scream and shake your fist at God and say "WHY ME AND WHY MY BABY?!". Then you need to pick yourself up and move along. You may have another day where you're going to lose it. Go ahead scream and cry but do it with your support. This is a marathon journey not a sprint. I liken more to a very long roller coaster ride, a lot of ups and downs.
Four years ago I was in the pit of autism. I let it burn me out to where I just couldn't cope.Did I want a "normal" kid, of course I did!! Did I scream and cry?? Of course I did!! Then I moved along and got support and moved along some more. Without the support and love of my family, friends, PITAs, mentors, TACA, Akshay's therapy team, etc, I don't think you'd see the kid I have today. I wouldn't be the mother and wife I am today if it wasn't for the support. I learned a very important lesson...I CANNOT do this alone. No one can do this alone. Autism wasn't a club I wanted to join and I am trying to get out of it. At the same time I'm not leaving anyone behind. If I'm getting out, we all are getting out. I have days were I cry because autism sucks but those days are becoming less and less.
If your are reading this and you're in the despair of autism, PLEASE reach out to us!!! There are so many people here to help!!! Facebook alone is a great support. TACAnow.org. Reach out and I know I can find you the help and support you need.
Thanks for reading. I just couldn't let this go today and I really felt I needed to say it. Never ever give up!